For the past couple of weeks I've had some sort of cold virus that just won't let go. Or maybe it's been more than one virus. At the very least, it's put a huge dent in my training schedule as I'm now on day four of "rest."
Trying to do only half the workout didn't work. And three days of no training hasn't helped. So it's hard not to get frustrated and impatient with my body that won't do what I want it to do...which is get back to 100% healthy.
But I suspect that while I may be trying to follow a certain agenda, God has a different idea in mind. Like maybe breaking me of my habit of calculating my odds of actually finishing this triathlon. And breaking me of trusting in a plan, not His plan. Why do I have these suspicions? Because every time I think about committing more days to rest instead of training, I begin to worry that I just won't make it. And what seems like possibly attainable with following a plan suddenly seems as unattainable as swimming across an ocean.
Which again brings me back to the place of confirming what I felt in the beginning of committing to a triathlon...that God wants to show me what He can do. And to do that, He has to empty me of my strength. How I want Him to show me His mighty strength. I just didn't know it would be that hard to let go...and let God.
Have any of you struggled in this? Maybe it wasn't athletic in scope, but you had to learn what it meant to walk in God's strength. How did you get through it? What encouraged you? What did you gain when you got to the other side?