Tuesday, October 11, 2011

the kind of prayer epilogue

(If you read this post first, the following will make much more sense. ;) )

Well...God answered "no" to the first prayer. The weather was too wonderful for people to be inclined to be inside. If I didn't have to be there, I don't think I would have been there.

Yet, despite the boredom of the long day and doubts that I'd ever do another craft show again, I asked God about it afterward. Had I been in the wrong place? Were the lack of sales a reflection of my lack of discernment...faith...trust in Him? Did I do something wrong? Was my attitude not pleasing to Him? Knowing He tests the conditions of our hearts, I often scrutinize mine. Probably obsessively.

Thankfully, His stillness thundered over the clamor going on inside my head. "You were exactly where I wanted you to be," He whispered.

Oh.

And I still feel that with peaceful certainty - I was exactly where He wanted me to be and I can't imagine being anywhere else. It doesn't change the fact that it was hard to go through, but I'm grateful that God took the focus off of me (where did I go wrong) to Him (what is He going to do with this experience). In that alone, He already has answered the first part of my second prayer.

And I know He will answer the second part of it too. In His way and in His time. All I need to do is wait. And watch. And hope. And trust.

1 comment:

Lora said...

i totally understand. i've done several craft shows in the past few years and it can be disappointing when the turnout isn't what you were hoping and praying for. but you are so right - it's all about the Lord. and i'm learning more and more each time i do a show that it's way more about the relationships that i'm building than the sales i make. i know that God is using you and the works of your hands to bless others! keep on keeping on, my friend! :) lora